FUNNY JOKES

Best Punishment Dat U Can Give 2 Male..

Giv Him A Mobile With A

Set Of Girls Phone No.S & Put Him

In A Place Where Theres No Netwrk

FUNNY JOKES

Best Punishment Dat U Can Give 2 Male..

Giv Him A Mobile With A

Set Of Girls Phone No.S & Put Him

In A Place Where Theres No Netwrk

FUNNY JOKES

Question: What is the most effective way to remember your wifes birthday?
Ans. Just forget it once and you will never forget it again.

FUNNY JOKES

Wife:What is 10 years with me?
Husband:A second.

Wife:What is $1000 for me?
Husband:A coin.

Wife: Ok give me a coin.
Husband:Wait a second

FUNNY JOKES

If your father is a poor man,
It is your fate but,
If your father-in-law is a poor man,
its your stupidity.

FUNNY JOKES

A Camel, cow & a Donkey discusing who is the best
Camel: i help in moving heavy loads
Cow: i give milk..
.. Kuch to bol yar teri izzat ka sawal ha..

FUNNY JOKES

A Camel, cow & a Donkey discusing who is the best
Camel: i help in moving heavy loads
Cow: i give milk..
.. Kuch to bol yar teri izzat ka sawal ha..

FUNNY JOKES

Cool style of proposing:
I have spent many sleepless nights in your love and I dont want my son to do the same for your daughter.. so lets make them brother and sister.

FUNNY JOKES

Cool style of proposing:
I have spent many sleepless nights in your love and I dont want my son to do the same for your daughter.. so lets make them brother and sister.

FUNNY JOKES

A man in USA saw a dog attacking a lady, he kicked the dog - it died.
Newspaper reported: Local hero saved lady from a crazy dog!
Man said, I am not American
Report changed to: Foreign hero saved lady from a crazy dog!
Man said, Actually I am Pakistani
Report changed to: Terrorist killed an innocent dog.

FUNNY JOKES

A man in USA saw a dog attacking a lady, he kicked the dog - it died.
Newspaper reported: Local hero saved lady from a crazy dog!
Man said, I am not American
Report changed to: Foreign hero saved lady from a crazy dog!
Man said, Actually I am Pakistani
Report changed to: Terrorist killed an innocent dog.

FUNNY JOKES

Dermatologist: Good news! test results report that you will no longer be plagued by pimples.
Girl: Great, how come?
Dermatologist: There is no more space left.

FUNNY JOKES

Power=Work/Time
.. Time=Work/Power
But
Knowldge is Power
&
Time is Money
so Money= Work/Knowldge

If Knowldge=0
Money=infinity

So Y study?

FUNNY JOKES

Boy: "I sent love leters to my girlfrnd everyday for 3years."
Frnd: "Then what happened?"
Boy:"Nothing finally She maried the postman :D

FUNNY JOKES

An American once had spicy Sri lankan food.He rushed to the toilet, came back & said:
Now i understand y Sri lankan use water, it could burn the tissue paper!

FUNNY JOKES

A Successful Doctor
is one who knows
the art of keeping
the patient busy
in investigations
and prescriptions till
Nature Cures the Disease

FUNNY JOKES

Today Is Balance Sharing Day,
So Send Me Maximum Balance & Give
The
Proof Of Ur Friendship
With Me
Happy Balance Day.. ->

FUNNY JOKES

Wife:What Will You Give Me If I Successfully Climb & Reach The Top Of The Great Mt.Everest..





Husband:A Gentle Push..

FUNNY JOKES

One day a girl will come in ur life..



Come close to u..



Hug u..



Kiss u..


&


Will say..



I LOVE U DADDY..!!!

FUNNY JOKES

Workers discuss Football, Managers discuss Cricket,
Top Boss discuss Tennis
&
CEOs discuss Golf

Moral:Higher u go,

Ur Balls become Smaller

FUNNY JOKES

Boy:Isnt the Princi a duffer!
Girl:Do u Know who Im?
Boy:No
Girl:Im the Princis daughter
Boy:Do u know who Im?
Girl:No
Boy:Thank God!!!

FUNNY JOKES

Husband went to abroad for 15 days.
Wife: darling its 15 days now. When will u come back? I am half-dead.

Husband: half-dead ! Ok then i will come after 15 days.

FUNNY JOKES

A husband made a call2hospital2enquire abt hs prgnent wife.Bt accidently d call wen2a cricket stadium..
He askd wat is d condition?

He got atack aftr wat he heard..

7 r already out..3 mor will b out hopfully by lunch. The 1st one ws a duck.

FUNNY JOKES

Life Was Lonely.
No One Was There.
I Had No Good Friend.
And When You Came Into My Life Then I Realised That..

"Being lonely was better yaar!"

FUNNY JOKES

Whats the difference between a good lawyer & a great lawyer??
A good lawyer knows the law well & A great lawyer knows the Judge very well

FUNNY JOKES

Who do you think is the LAZIEST inventor of all times?

Its the guy who invented the SNOOZE in an alarm -)

FUNNY JOKES

2 eyes r best friends.
Both c together
Both blink together.
Both sleep &cry together,
But whn they c a girl
only one blink.
Moral: Girls can break any relation.

FUNNY JOKES

6 flowers 4 u-
1 for health,
1 for wealth,
1 for happiness,
1 for frendshp,
aur baki 2 aise he kaan pe laga lena.Ache lagoge

FUNNY JOKES

6 flowers 4 u-
1 for health,
1 for wealth,
1 for happiness,
1 for frendshp,
aur baki 2 aise he kaan pe laga lena.Ache lagoge

FUNNY JOKES

Do U know FULL FORM of DAIRYMILK ?
Darling Always I remember you, meet immediately 4 a lovely kiss.
Thats why most BOYS give DAIRYMILK TO GIRLS

FUNNY JOKES

Technologys Impact:

Dad emails:

Dear son,
How hav u been?
Ur mom & I are fine & we miss u a lot..
Plz Turnoff ur PC & come downstairs for dinner..:-)

FUNNY JOKES

Wat is confidence? and over confidence ? One day 14 boys decided 2 propose a girl..
12 boys came with roses,
one boy came
with a
Ring
Thats confidence:)!! And another boy came wit a condom. tats over confidence:-D!!!!

FUNNY JOKES

Police arrested a drunkard & askd: Where r u going?

Man: Im going 2 listen lecture on ill effects of drinking.

Cop: Wholl lecture at midnight ?

Man: My wife..

FUNNY JOKES

Before marriage: Roses are red, sky is blue. U r beautiful, I luv u.

After marriage: Roses are dead, Im blue. U r my headache, one day Ill
kill u.

FUNNY JOKES

Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

FUNNY JOKES

Always keep ur picture in ur pocket,
u know y?
Whenever u face any problem just see ur pic and say 3 times,
if i can face tis i can face anything.

FUNNY JOKES

Just imagine world with out girl?
Park empty
theaters silent
police at rest
all mobile compny loss
no sms
all boys getting rank

FUNNY JOKES

Boyfriend: I hate 2 see a girl standing in a bus when I am comfortabley seated.
Girlfriend: So what do you do? Boyfriend: I close my eyes :-D

FUNNY JOKES

The m0st t0uching break up shayari ever-

dil t0d ke dete ho pyar ki tanhai ka khauf..

dil t0d ke dete h0 pyar ki tanhai ka khauf..

F**k off!

F**k off!

F**k off! Lol

FUNNY JOKES

boy - baby i love you :) i love you all ur smile, attitude, beauty, body, brother, sister, mother, father, everything............

will

u

please


give me the


DIVORCE!!!

FUNNY JOKES

Teacher: where is everest?
Student: I don kno..
Teacher: U Stand on the desk!
Student: stil cannot see maam

FUNNY JOKES

KISS S KEY OF LOVE,
LOVE S LOCK OF MARRIAGE,
MARRIAGE S BOX OF CHILDREN,
CHILDREN R FUTURE OF SRILANKA!
So
So
START KISSING
&
DEVELOP SRI LANKA

FUNNY JOKES

A successful marriage depends on one simple equation:
Wife having beauty secrets and husband having secret beauties.

FUNNY JOKES

Fact of life:
If u luv sum1 and
marry sum1 else,the one u marry becomes the partner of your life and the one u loved becomes the passwrd of ur mail id..

FUNNY JOKES

Heart Of Boys R Like a Temple!!

Holy
Truthful
Pure



Thats Why,
When Boys Say..
I Love You,
,
,
,
,
Girls Remove Their Slippers..

FUNNY JOKES

A Psychology Report..
When 2 Couples come face to face..??

Wives look at each others SARIS
&
Husbands Look at each others WIFE..!!!

FUNNY JOKES

Every c0mmitted guys prayer-
L0rd, pls giv me WISD0M 2 understand my G.F & PATIENCE 2 deal with her m00ds.
D0nt give me STRENGTH
0r Ill kill dat b!tch ???

FUNNY JOKES

A woman walked up to a little old man.
how happy u look, she said. Whats ur secret 4 a long happy life?
I smoke 3 packs of cigarettes a day, he said. I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, n nevr exercise.
Thats amazing, said d woman, how old r u?
26

FUNNY JOKES

GOD: I cant b evrywhere so I created MOTHER.
DEVIL: I too cant b evrywhere so I created GIRLS.
GOD: Dont worry I hav created BOYS to change them to MOTHERS!!!

FUNNY JOKES

LOVE

In FraNce:
its a comedy!

in GeRmaNy:
its a tRagedy!

In Italy:
its woNdeR!

In Sri lanka:



Its a NATIONAL GAME!

FUNNY JOKES

Teacher-i gave u essay 2write on dogs,y didnt u write?
Sam-whenever i go 2write on dog,it runs away

FUNNY JOKES

DRINKS
D-elicious aftr 1 Peg.
R-omantic aftr 2 peg.
I-nterested aftr 3 peg.
N-aughty aftr 4 peg.
K-ing aftr 5 peg.
S-nake aftr 6 peg..
Cheers!!!

FUNNY JOKES

Define Agony: A one armed man hanging at the edge of a cliff by his only arm and with his butt poorly itchy. Define Death: He scratched it.

FUNNY JOKES

An aeroplane asks a rocket: How is that you can fly so fast?
The rocket replies you will know the pain when they put fire at your ass!

FUNNY JOKES

Santa: Dear son, this time you have to get at least 95% marks.
Pappu: No dad, I will get 100% this time. Santa: Why are u making a joke?
Pappu: Who started first?

FUNNY JOKES

Santa visits Mysore palace.
Guide: Please dont sit there, this is Tipu Sultans chair.
Santa: Dont worry, I will get up when he comes.

FUNNY JOKES

95 year old David and 90 year old Martha went to a lawyer to get a divorce. The lawyer asked,How long have you been married?
David answered,75 rough and rocky years
Lawyer asked,Then, why have you waited so long to file for divorce?
Martha replied,We had to wait for the kids to die!

FUNNY JOKES

Rajanikant is remaking TITANIC with some changes...
In d end HE doesnt die but swims across the ocean wth heroine in 1 hand and





TITANIC on d other hand..

FUNNY JOKES

Amazing SIX facts-

1. 90% of ppl in myanmar dont drink milk..

2. Snakes vision is upto 5 kms..

3. A man can touch sun if his body is completely surrounded by mercury

4. No twins hav been born til now in greenland

5. Zebra doesnt hav liver

6. Thanks 4 being a FOOL :-D

FUNNY JOKES

Love the LADY
but dont touch
the BODY
if u touch the BODY
u become a DADDY
plz send this sms 2 10 boys and try 2 decrease the population in Sri lanka

jayaheva

FUNNY JOKES

HEADLINE NEWS!
Govt of USA has released a statement-
Michael Jackson cant b cremated as itz against Emission Laws
He is 80% plastic,so he must b RECYCLED!

FUNNY JOKES

Parents to a College Watchmen:
Is this college good?

Watchman:
Probably the best.. I did my Engineering here & got
immediate placement..!

FUNNY JOKES

Origin of Ramayan:
Mickey fights with Donald,

Donald throws Mickey 2 d wall

Then Mickey started writing RAMAYANA
Why?










coz Mickey bcums
WALLMICKEY!

FUNNY JOKES

What is difference between-
1. Boyfrend,
2. Lover,
3. Husband
4. EX boyfrend.


simple..yaar


1. prepaid,
2. postpaid,
3. Lifetime,
4. Coin box.!.

FUNNY JOKES

A little bird was flying in winter.The bird froze and afell to ground. A cow came by & dropped some dung ona it.Bird began 2 realize how warm it was & soon began to sing for joy.A passing cat heard the bird singing & dug him out & ate him.
Lessons to Learn !
1. Not everyone who drops shit on u is ur enemy.
2. Not everyone who gets u out of shit is ur friend.
3. When youre in deep shit, keep ur mouth shut!